Comparisons

I saw this post on Facebook this morning, and thought I'd share it here as it is a very timely post, given what I was reflecting on this week. 

I am very lucky to dance with quite a few talented, strong and beautiful adult dancers across the different classes I attend in a week. While it's often inspiring to watch as they lift their legs seemingly effortlessly into beautiful extensions, pick up choreography almost instantly, soar across the studio with their long legs in perfect synchrony with the other dancers, execute exciting triples and occasionally quadruples, it can also get a little demoralising when I struggle while they nail nearly every step. I do often wonder if I"ll ever get to where they are. 

Don't get me wrong - I know I am fortunate to have reasonably strong technique and have been blessed with "a ballerina's body" (as Tibor puts it). So there is much I have to be grateful for. But every dancer constantly strives for the next level of achievement, and like all others, there is so much more I'd like to achieve.

This week, as I threw on my pointe shoes mindlessly for the pas de deux class on Wednesday and the variation class on Friday, it occurred to me how far I have come in just one year. Less than 11 months ago, I was not able to do a relevé nor a fondue on the one leg at the barre, and now, I feel rather at home in the centre and excited about giving new things a go én pointe. I find myself doing steps like pirouettes, jumps en pointe in arabesque, and grande allegro in pointe shoes without much of a second thought any more. They're not perfect of course, but they're decent. In comparison, last June, I struggled to do even simple courrous down the diagonal without turning pale from the pain. (A big part of it is thanks to Tibor's training method, frustrating as it might be at times. He throws difficult steps at us and makes us feel like it's normal and totally expected of us; that it's no big deal and that we should be able to do it at our level.)

Healthy competition is fine....

Looking back on how far I've come in just one year has made me realise that there has been tremendous improvement, and that I should not knock myself for not dancing like the girl standing next to me. And it also gives me comfort that if I continue to improve over the months, being able to dance like them someday is very possible.

I therefore cannot agree more with  the post I read this morning - I have found that some healthy competition does make us all strive harder and want to do so much better, but it's very important that we do compare where we are at today with where we were just not too long ago. 
 

The "dimple" on the bottom

It can get so very confusing, trying to figure out exactly which muscles to engage. Just standing in first, you pull up the back of the knees, the quads, squeeze the inner thigh muscles, all of your butt muscles and before you know it everything is one tight ball of sinew and you're told that you're "gripping" the buttocks in the wrong way. Then you try to let those muscles go and it's all floppy and you're "sitting" once again.

It is all so subtle but just last week, the very lovely and patient Andrea Briody spent time pointing out to me the exact muscle I need to isolate and engage, without gripping ALL the muscles for dear life. And once I got it, and we talked about "making that little dimple" (above the crease of the bum where the back of the thighs connect to it) as one might teach a child, I found it so much easier to identify exactly when I was doing it right and when I was doing it wrong. They say different imageries work for different people, and this one certainly has helped me.

On Saturday, I worked hard at remembering to activate that specific group of muscles (the 6 deep external rotators, I believe) throughout barre work, and I can happily report that my balances on demi-pointe, whether in coupe, retire, arabesque or attitude improved by more than 200%.  I felt pulled up and stable especially around the hip and inner thigh which helps to keep the standing heel turned out too - I could almost stand there in equilibrium for quite a while once I found my balance. What an amazing feeling!

I wasn't so successful in the centre however, because there is always so much happening that it's not yet automatic for me to activate those muscles instantly while trying to remember to do everything else correctly. But at least my pirouettes did show improvement and I am very hopeful that with enough practice and mindfulness, this will be the key to fixing quite a few of the things I've been struggling with lately - especially everything related to my "sitting" habit and heaviness in my jumps.

Can't wait to get back into classes again this week to keep activating the "dimple" and see if I continue to get consistent results each time. Thanks Andrea!

P.S. - I've looked around on the internet to find some explanations which may help and I found this to be helpful if you'd like to know if you're using the external rotators or doing that "gripping" thing too.

First Position

A few weeks ago, I received an email inviting me to the media preview screening of First Position. "As the creator of a dance blog, I'm getting in touch with you about a fantastic dance documentary that we'll be releasing in cinemas in Australia next month – FIRST POSITION" the invite started. How very exciting! I had the privilege of watching First Position as dear Margaret's guest last year when it made it to Australia for a very short stint at the Sydney Film Festival, and thoroughly welcomed the opportunity to watch it again on Thursday last week. 

Brought out here by Hopscotch Films, First Position opens in cinemas here in Australia tomorrow, April 11. Although a few years old now,  First Position is definitely worth watching, especially if you're a dancer or if you love ballet. You will relate well to the trials, frustrations, heartbreaks and the triumphs that each of the dancer's stories has in store. I laughed so hard, and I also found myself tearing up both times I've watched it. As a documentary, it is very well edited and certainly captures well the moments that make you hold your breath, and then sink back again into your chair, with a little wipe of your eyes while you laugh at the same time. 

Watch it and you will find yourself going on to youtube after that to find out where each of the dancers are today. And you will find it impossible not to be inspired by these young courageous dancers in pursuit of their dreams. 

Thank you, Hopscotch Films for my first ever invite to a Media Preview - it was a very nice way for me to celebrate 2 years of being a dance blogger! 

Very lucky to have such wonderful ballet buddies to share the experience with.
From L - R: Belinda, Trish, me and Lynda.

"Constipated" dancer

I returned from my pas de deux class feeling very uninspired tonight. I struggled with every turn and every jump and "looked constipated" as Tibor put it. Everybody else around me seems to be improving in leaps and bounds and all I can feel in class is my heaviness and a desperate sinking into my pointe shoes. Having my new Gaynor Mindens on (the best pointe shoes I've ever danced in, though this remains controversial for many dancers) didn't make a difference either. My dancing has been rather inconsistent lately, so it's probably time to take a deep breath and take stock again.

There is no great learning in this particular blog. There is no great insight that I can provide here tonight. I just needed an outlet for my emotions, and perhaps some day in the future when I experience another spurt of growth and improvement in my abilities, as I surely must once I pick myself up again, we can look back at this point in time and know that things do always get better if you just keep at it.

Some men have thousands of reasons why they cannot do what they want to, when all they need is one reason why they can. 

-Martha Graham-

Sylvie Guillem, the legend of our era

I stood less than 3 metres away from Sylvie Guillem on Friday night.  As we stood to give her a standing ovation at our front row seats and as she stood there, right in front of us taking her bows, all I could do was savour that moment of being in such close proximity to the dancer I consider the greatest and most technically perfect in this era. As it was her last night performing in Sydney, she had post-performance obligations which meant we never got to see her at the stage door, but nevertheless, watching her dance, live, was simply sublime. In truth, I would have loved to see her in a classical ballet performance, but I'm not sure if that opportunity will ever come by again, given this stage of her career.

Sylvie performed Rearray and Bye in the 6000 Miles Away production, choreographed by William Forsythe and Mats Ek respectively. Not being a connoisseur of contemporary dance myself, I did enjoy the performances but cannot say I could fully appreciate what some reviewers have described as choreographic masterpieces. But I can say I was thoroughly enthralled by the almost humanly- impossible strength, flexibility, artistry and mastery of her body that she displayed, with such ease and rawness, and in a body that seemed so much younger than her 48 years. The way she lifts her legs so effortlessly into an almost 180 degree position devant, from just about any position, will be etched in my mind forever. In person, she was so much smaller than the imposing, towering figure I had always imagined her to be (from the videos I've seen of her) and so much more, well, normal and human, funny as that may sound. She had warmth in her face and styled in a way that made you feel like she had just dropped by for a chat and had launched into a dance for you instead. 

My favourite piece for the night was Bye, which made fabulous use of video projections on a screen, with her seamlessly transitioning from behind the screen to the stage, or vice versa, always in perfect alignment with the video. Watching her seemingly slip in and out of the box so perfectly timed and aligned with the video brought back some childlike wonder in me, reminding me of the time I was five years old and trying to figure out how people got inside the television box. Which was very apt, given the childlike joy and energy she brought at different points in this piece.

I must say I did very much enjoy Jiri Kylian's opening piece of 27'52" too (danced magnificently by Natasa Novotna and Vaclav Kunes) although some reviewers have described it as the least compelling work for the night. 

And my best memory from the night? The humility and genuine delight with which she accepted our applause and standing ovation. As one reviewer perfectly put it "Her unaffected joy at the standing ovation she received showed us a person unspoiled by all the accolades she’s earned over her long career." 

I didn't think I'd be nervous

We had our Masterclass with the amazing Isabelle Ciaravola on Monday evening. Divine as she was on stage, she was even more so in person than when viewed from a distance, in the theatre. Perhaps because up close and personal, we were able to see every detail of her perfectly turned out legs with those almost freakishly beautiful arched feet and we could see the sparkles in her eyes when she smiled and spoke to us animatedly in her French-accented English. And it was only up close that I realised how petite she was and I could get a real appreciation for how much strength and power was packed in that tiny, flexible and graceful body of hers.

Being nervous in class was something I had not expected at all. I remember some of the others saying a few days before that they were feeling rather nervous about the Masterclass, and I had said "Don't be - just come and have fun! It's not like she's auditioning us for anything..." Then on Monday evening, as Isabelle swept into class, said a warm hello and took her place at the barre to demonstrate the first exercise, I was so distracted just watching her I could hardly absorb the steps. Which started me on the downward spiral - the less I could remember of each exercise, the more my confidence eroded and  when I noticed that our class was being recorded (which would mean that all my mistakes would be immortalised), it just got worse. Add to that the fact that at the front of the class Tibor and Damian, whom we so wanted to make proud, were watching us, and I was quite the bundle of nerves within minutes of the class starting. I made little mistakes throughout the barre, and I could hardly dance. My arms were wrong and they were stiff and awkward and every time I felt the video camera pointed in my direction, I almost froze. When we got to the centre, I somehow found myself up in front of the class and almost in the centre - something I am getting used to doing in most normal classes as I try to get myself to overcome the fear of being in the front row - but on this Monday night, I was almost petrified and at one point I remember saying to myself "this is ridiculous, I just feel like running away." Things finally turned the corner when we moved to the back of the class and started doing pirouettes and jumps, line by line. I felt my nerves slowly dissolve and some semblance of dancing came back into my body. Even when I tripped over my own toe and nearly fell on my face (thanks Veronique for letting me grab hold of you) when we were practising the sissone-coupé-assemblé combination, which elicited some friendly laughter from both Tibor and Isabelle, I was actually able to laugh at myself by then.

Despite the very uncomfortable first half of the class for me, it all came to an end far too quickly - this night that will forever be etched in my mind for a myriad of reasons...my first time being taught by an Etoile of one of the best ballet companies in the world, the many wonderful reminders and tips she gave us (some of which I probably missed in my distracted and nervous state), the inspiration I felt just watching her work her feet and legs, hold her balances, move her arms, and elevate in her jumps, and all the unexpected emotions and challenges I faced during those 90 minutes in class. It was really wonderful that Isabelle was so real and unpretentious and tried to pay each of us - in a large class of more than 30 - some attention, making eye contact and connecting with us, even if for the most fleeting of moment, throughout the evening. And she was oh, so, so funny -  just a very natural sense of humour  which was not forced or canned in any way. As I emerged from my first minutes of being mesmerised by her, I remember her breaking the ice with "Don't look like monkeee, ah!" as she came out of a forward bend and warned us against sticking our backsides out. And I really cracked up when after our adage in the centre, she told us that we were too late coming out of our penches, as she mimed a penche, then did the sign of the cross first before moving on into the faille then renversé, intimating that our prayers for holy intervention had slowed us down.

One very lucky group of adult students, with Isabelle, Tibor, Damian and our "maestro" for the evening,
Grant.

After a most complexed reverence at the end of class, we all burst into such thunderous and prolonged applause for her that I almost expected shouts of "encore" next. We then got organised for a group photo with her and while she took a break, I couldn't do anything more than flop on the floor with relief, excitement as well as disappointment (at the incompetence I'd just shown in class) with the other ladies while we "de-briefed" and shared our thoughts, emotions and experiences with each other. After about 15 minutes, Isabelle came back into the studio and patiently and obligingly autographed our programmes and pointe shoes and took photos with each of us who wanted personal shots with her. At one point, when Lynda said to her "I'd love your autograph but I have nothing to ask you to sign" she said "you have nothing to sign?" and without missing a beat, she asked Tibor for the stack of the masterclass posters which she knew he had, and signed it, personalised, for Lynda.

Lynda and I, with étoile Isabelle

And that's the summary of my encounter with an amazing, talented, beautiful, warm, funny and generous woman....she's all class.


  

The Paris Opera Ballet in Sydney

I was a Paris Opera Ballet virgin until last night, when I experienced them for the first time ever, live at the Capitol Theatre in Sydney. It was gorgeous, sublime, amazing and grand....as you would expect of the Paris Opera Ballet performing Giselle. I couldn't get enough of the Corps dancing - they were mesmerising and to me, very close to perfection. Quick, sharp and extremely light on their feet, they were so coordinated, so synchronised and  every arm, leg and foot seemed to be in perfect position and alignment.

Our etoiles for the night were Isabelle Ciaravola (with her divine, unmistakable, signature "fished"arabesques) as Giselle, a very convincing Karl Paquette as Prince Albrecht and Emilie Cozette as Myrtha. I am no expert dance critic, so I won't even attempt to write a review of their dancing. All I can say is that I loved every minute of the performance - there was so much technical perfection, grace and beauty to admire and appreciate - and while others may beg to differ, it was actually Charline Giezendanner in her peasant pas de deux who took my breath away the most, and the corps who stole the show for me. 

It will be a night to remember for a very long time, that I'm sure of. And the very great thing is, the Paris Opera Ballet experience is not yet over for me (and quite a few of my ballet buddies). We have the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to take a Master Class with Isabelle Ciaravola at Studio Tibor in less than 5 day's time and words can't even begin to describe how excited I am about it. It's going to be a little surreal being in the same studio as this ethereal-like being whom I've just watched command the stage, but I'm going to soak up and savour every one of the 90 minutes! Will let you know how we go....